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Author Archives: jp

Paper Doll “ARTIST” • February 19th, 2014

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TONIGHT! FEB. 19th, 2014 from 9pm until midnight, at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!
Project: “ARTIST” paper doll, a craftnight CLASSIC!
Processing Fee: $2 donation please
Drink Special: $4 for The Lyla, a zesty concoction of whiskey and ginger beer!

Do you like to color? Tonight we bring you a coloring craft extraordinaire, where you get to color in a custom Craft Project illustrated and designed by your Craft Captain!
In 12 years of CraftNight, I think we’ve only done this project one other time, and it was probably about 4 or 6 years ago. It’s a very malleable craft, one where you don’t ever have to make the same thing twice. It consists of a body, and limbs that you attach with metal brads, so that you can pose it however you like! The final product is a wacky figure of an “Artist” of your making, made to express creativity as you see fit.
CraftNight Lieutenant, Elaine Walker, and possibly another CraftNight Lieutenant or two will be at the helm tonight, with everything you need to get artsy fartsy!
I am up north with my wonderful Grandmother, who just had her 92nd birthday, (WOOOO!!! Grandma, I know you read this! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!) and I’ll be back next week with another craft project for everyone at Akbar!
Come in and ART it up at CraftNight!
JP Craft Captain
www.akbarsilverlake.com
www.crafthead.com

 

Posted by on February 19, 2014 in Uncategorized

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Valentine Party LOVE-IN • February 12th, 2014

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This Wednesday, February 12th, 2014 from 9pm to 1:30am at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!
Project: Valentine Party LOVE IN!!! 
$2 Donation, por favor
$4 DRINK SPECIAL!!! >>> Show some sass, put a Lyla in your glass! 

TATER TOTS • CRAFTNIGHT ROBOT • TREATS • AKBAR JUMBOTRON • LOVE! 

CraftNight believes in embracing both the delight and dread that comes with Valentines Day, so if you want to give and receive cards that are racy, crazy, lovely, smarmy, tacky, fancy, etc. you will find EVERYTHING YOU NEED to make what you want, exploring every sentiment you have. This is a DELUXE CraftNight, consider unlocking this achievement, it’s not to be missed.

See you at the Craft Table,

JP

It’s now time for my yearly diatribe about Valentine’s Day, as I am a lifelong Romance Activist. Feel free to read or skip, there’s also a list of stuff happening in LA at the bottom.

Every year I get to hear about how much people hate valentine’s day and every year, I roll my eyes and fall on the floor BORED TO DEATH. Oh the excuses!
“I hate Valentines Day Because”

  • Never had a valentine
  • Just a Corporate scheme
  • New relationship, don’t want valentines day to “mean” something
  • Price of Roses  = Highway robbery
  • Too much pink
  • Valentines Day is every day, traditions are dumb

blah blah BLAHHHHHHH!!!! 

If you’re going to hate Valentine’s Day, consider avoidance of hating it in the cliché way (drinking with single friends by self, doing nothing at all, eating ALL the chocolate and crying by yourself, proudly criticizing all the tackiness and shoddy merchandise on the shelves) If you’re gonna hate, hate WELL, and hate inventively.

  1. In protest of Valentines Day, take a vow of silence, and do not talk to or interact with your partner (or anyone else!) for 24 hours.
  2. Get wasted, call every ex you’ve ever had and make fart sounds into their answering machines, OR live, should they pick up.
  3. Purchase heart-shaped piñata, fill with packets of JELL-O pudding, invite friends to smash.
  4. Drive to LA’s most romantic make-out vistas (Griffith Park Observatory, Mulholland Drive, Beachwood Canyon Overlook, etc.) blast Peter Cetera really loudly, and throw those chalky valentine candies at people trying to kiss.
  5. Wear only a thong and give unwanted hugs at an advanced film premiere of “Winter’s Tale” 

“Valentines Day should be every day” who are we kidding, it’s not, it’s just not. It’s not sustainable, because laundry, life chores, etc. and you kind of have to get back to everyday maintenance, valentine or no valentine. But there is always room for practicing bits of generosity when you can find the time, so if you’re not totally anti-Valentine’s Day, this holiday is still useful for taking the time to plant new and surprising varietals of kindness:

  1. SELF – I know I know, Calgon take me away but c’mon! Treat yourself to a 3 Terrabyte hard drive, buy the fancy bougie artisan salt you’ll never let yourself have, start that weird project you’ve got in your back pocket, buy the shoes, visit the salon, try some “tough love” and do the difficult things you don’t like doing but are essentially good for you (taxes, health insurance, budgeting, other paperwork).
  2. FRIENDS/FAM – Call the old friend who is gonna love hearing your voice, send Grandma a hand-written letter, recognize the sacrifice and love it took your caretaker or parent to give when you were a junior-high brat, babysit for some parents who could use a night out, mop the floor even if it’s not your turn, remind your mentor/role model how they inspire you, surprise your neighbor with a rhyming card and a package of energy-saving lightbulbs.
  3. FOR KIDS – OMG The Lego Movie even if you hate stuff like that take your friends kids who are hyperventilating every time they see the poster, show your nieces and nephews how to properly roll down a grassy hill, instill lasagna making skills in every 8 year old you meet, make ’em a valentine’s day scavenger hunt.
  4. PETS – Take dog to water feature or off-leash park/trail, give cat most obnoxiously-priced cat from pet store, give turtle organic greens and let ’em walk around on fresh grass, put opening-closing treasure chest that blurts bubbles into fish tank, take parrot on exciting excursion, whatever makes ’em happy!
  5. ABSTRACT – Visit someone’s marker at the cemetery (or however you wanna remember them), Donate time or money to a charity who gives love and help to those in need, make or deliver some meals, do some meditation on love and send some outward with your mind. Send love to the invisible, the forgotten, the lonely, the darkest and most desperate, sad and angry parts of yourself,  the stuff we try to keep ourselves from seeing.

Consider letting February 14th be your “excuse” to make love an impetus for change. 

Okay, thanks for reading, now onward to the goings ons!

CITY LOVE! 

It’s Los Angeles Zine Week! All over the place you can find events, readings, workshops and exhibitors galore!

FEB 12th: Pantsuit Power Hour – Head to the Must after CraftNight to hand out your business-style valentines, maybe you’ll get a Valentine Business promotion or bonus!

FEB 13th: Los Angeles Artwalk! Free, fun, and celebrating art every month!

FEB 15th: Planet Queer’s LOVE ROCKET From Ian MacKinnon and Travis Wood is a fabulous night of performance, art, music, community and MORE (at Akbar!)

My favorite chocolate shop in LA is Teuscher in BH, every bit worth taking my Echo Park butt across LaBrea, how about you? Of course, the Chocolate Indulgence Tour might be an interesting way to find more cocoa in your cocopuffs.

Be a Virtual Valentine Volunteer right now from where you’re sitting (Volunteer Match!)

One last thing (emphasis 2:34):

 

Posted by on February 11, 2014 in Uncategorized

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You’ve Been FRAMED! • February 5th, 2014

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Tonight! Wednesday, February 5th, 2014 from 9pm to midnight (or later) at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!
Project: Premium Quality Wooden Frames for your LIFE 
$2 Donation, por favor
$4 DRINK SPECIAL!!! >>> Be immersed! Let “The Lyla” sate your thirst!  

These frames are not those tiny wooden frames from IKEA, they are big and beautiful, with a wide border for lots of painting, gluing, etc. I am bringing the Polaroid, for an extra buck, I’ll take your photo and you can put it in your frame! Instant Gift!

Or, I dunno, go home and take 101 selfies of your junk with your phone, print out the 100th and put it in your frame for that special someone. However you decide to use your frame, it will be an unforgettable keepsake for years to come! If you’re feeling less frisky, make something glamorous for the mantel that won’t make you blush in front of any family members.

ALSO: It is World Nutella Day, and while I’m not totally sure what that means, we’ll be celebrating tonight with something edible starring (you guessed it) Nutella! Yay Italy!

ALSO: Next week’s CraftNight (FEB 12)  is DELUXE and Valentine-Oriented, Visit the Event and RSVP!!! (Gotta have enough tater tots)

In the photo below, inside the locket (right side) is “Lil’ Sad Rock from Puente” made by crafter, Little Taffy, and the googly eyes (left side) were glued to the forehead of longtime Akbar family member, Nat, photo by NJ Tucker.

cnight_valparty

See you at the Craft Table,
JP Craft Captain

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Posted by on February 5, 2014 in Uncategorized

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Year of the Horse • January 29th, 2014

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This Wednesday, January 29th, 2014 from 9pm to midnight (or later) at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!
Project: Horsin’ Around for Year of the Horse
$2 Donation, por favor
$4 DRINK SPECIAL!!! >>> Could be the Lyla, could be a cosmo… only your bartender knows for sure. 

Pony up to the bar, 2014 marks the year of the wooden horse, which is great, because I could only find wooden horses for us to decorate. And some of you will just have to settle for unicorns, I have quite a variety.

A foal can stand up about 10 minutes after being born, and just barely after that, it can walk around, ready to roam. This should give you a little bit of an idea for what the Chinese zodiac has to say about people born in the horse year.

Apparently, this year starts out of the gate with a formidable velocity, and if you’re wanting to do some traveling, or adventuring, or if you want a high-intensity, high productivity kind of year, this is it.
CraftNight has a wooden horse (or unicorn) waiting for you, and you can write or paint or decorate your big ideas onto your steed, and keep it in view as a reminder of your hopes and wishes until the year of the sheep, which will be way more introspective and thinky than 2014’s unbridled explosion of speed and power. So get stuff done NOW, you can relax next year.

It’s Superbowl XLVII this Groundhog Day, and since it is the year of the horse, signs point to a Broncos victory, but maybe we should ask a football-watching groundhog to make an official prediction.
Groundhog Day is the only holiday specifically dedicated to animal behavior, specifically: underground marsupials and their innate powers of weather prognostication!

See you at the Craft Table,
JP Craft Captain

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Celebrate Chinese New Year 

This temple in China Town will be holding a special ceremony to welcome The Year of the Horse from 10pm until midnight on January 30th.

Check out the super fun 115th Golden Dragon Parade and Chinese New Year Festival on February 1st!

On February 2nd you can go on The Great China Town Hunt involving mini tasks and unique quests in a madcap adventure to win the race!

We’re Havin’ a Drought

Read about Graywater Systems and how to build one!

Get a water conservation kit and help save water today!

Here are 100 Ways to Conserve Water… 

 

Posted by on January 27, 2014 in Uncategorized

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Placemats for Your Facemat • Jan. 22nd, 2014

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This Wednesday (TONIGHT!) January 22nd, 2014 from 9pm to midnight (or later) at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!
Project: Placemat for Your Facemat
$2 Donation, por favor
$4 DRINK SPECIAL!!! >>> The Lyla! Come to where the flavor is! \

It’s 2014, do you know where your private information is? Well don’t worry, there is stress-detecting technology in this email that has identified your habits.
We have finally figured out how to calm you down.
Do not fear, our data is encrypted with the best pie crusts, none of it has been pinched, rolled or made into a pie, to our knowledge. At this point, we’ve covertly culled enough statistics about your daily routines to surmise that what you could really use right now is crafts.
There is a very convincing report over here showing that attending this week’s CraftNight will fill you with a sense of camaraderie, as well as instill an appreciation for slowing down and playing with pipe cleaners.
Have you heard of contact paper?
Recently, I acquired a rather large clear roll of it, which means you can sandwich stuff in between the pieces and perform a sort of “cold lamination”
procedure. It’s perfect for placemats, and placemats are perfect for life. You can really let yourself go and preserve a variety of writings, drawings,
designs, collage, photos, and protect its quality for years to come. Here are a few things you can make this Wednesday Night:

  1. Make a placemat commemorating International SnowMobile Safety and Awareness Week (January 18 – 25)
  2. Answer all of your cat’s burning questions by writing the answers on a special placemat for your cat to read while the cat eats.
  3. Screw placemats, make COASTERS, YEOW!!!
  4. List Antov Chekhov’s 8 Qualities of Cultured People. Frequently misspell “Anton Chekhov.”
  5. Bring pictures of a friend, and immortalize them in a clear plastic placemat for posterity. Give placemat to another friend who knows this person.

Our premium spyware has revealed that you will enjoy this CraftNight very much, in fact, we’re trying to partner with Target, so that the more CraftNights you attend, points will be added to your Target Cartwheel account, which will make available to you an entire list of credit card numbers and account information for you to use and purchase anything you want in Target stores! Man, a teenager wouldn’t even think of something that cool!
FYI, while you were reading this, we found out from three subliminal online personality tests that most of you are Snape from Harry Potter, a third of you should be living in Portland, Oregon, and everyone is Beaker from the The Muppets. The enjoyment experienced from being categorized in a totally non-threatening way is directly proportionate to the smarminess of this shamelessly garish one-dimensional play upon your anxieties (that may or may not be) concerned with actual internet surveillance.

Tell your smartphone to remind you to come see us, and we’ll glue a googly eye to your smartphone!
See you at the Craft Table,
JP Craft Captain

Crafters Who Make Stuff Are Selling Their Wares! Git You Somma That! 

CraftNight enthusiast, Xtine draws AMAZING things that will melt your brain, including a fantastic series of presidents eating hot dogs!  Visit her Etsy Page and get a truly original, beautifully rendered piece of art for that special someone (that’s right, I’m talkin’ about YOU because it’s JanYOUary, hahhahahaha.)

Crafter extraordinaire, Kristen Erickson’s got some ceramics over at Fifth Floor Gallery in China Town, but you can view more of her stuff on Coroflot (not just ceramics, print, graphics, more!) too, our household owns some of her bowls and goblets, they are lovely to look at, and wonderful to use.

You gotta take your Vitamin Cats, and Angie Cho, another excited crafter, has a whole crazy Etsy store just waiting for you to get a few!

 

 

Posted by on January 22, 2014 in Uncategorized

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