Author Archives: jp

Wednesday, August 20th, 2012 from 9pm(ish) until 12(or later) at Akbar,  it’s CRAFTNIGHT!
Project: Paper Pony Magnet Magic!
$2 Processing Fee
$4 Cosmopolitans: Nothing’s as fresh as a pinkie! 
Special Note: GOTHTOBER Applications are OPEN until TOMORROW at midnight!!!

>>> This is Gothtober >>>> This is the Gothtober BLOG 

New Development: CraftNight, in addition to art therapy now has massage thereapy!  Sky is a certified Kripalu bodyworker and will have his table set up and ready to go this week and (hopefully) subsequent weeks at CraftNight. Kripalu emphasizes “following the flow” of prana, or “life-force energy, compassionate self-acceptance, observing the activity of the mind without judgment, and taking what is learned into daily life.” It’s fine to approach Sky about times and prices while he’s already doing bodywork on someone else, there’s already so much going on, it’s not a distraction for him, get on his list!

I hope you’re excited to “pin one on” because we’re making pins so you can do just that. I have the facets, you have the might and the will and the way and all the materials to make a fashion SPLASH!!!

Now then: I’m not saying I’m glomming on to the recent hoopla about the 80 year old woman “screwing up” the Jesus fresco… oh… wait a minute… I AM TOTALLY ABOUT TO GLOM.

We’ve all seen Jesus, my goodness have we seen him, just about every representation you can think of has come to light, boy do we know what he looks like, beard, thorns, bleeding, full of light, helping build a boat, multiplying the bread loaves, all that stuff, yep. And so here’s the latest rendition, a version made with great effort and care. The final product looks crazy and weird and modern and clunky all at the same time. It looks like a winter parka moon face fur person. It looks like someone’s GRANDMA painted it, it was “unauthorized” and “alarming”, people are shocked and outraged, and that is why it is glorious and totally the most authentic and telling Jesus portrait of our age.

How many “sacred” images of Jesus exist, and how many of them were farted out by apathetic yet talented artists hired by vapid and hypocritical religious rulers in a pitiful attempt to reflect the rare and ethereal state of holiness, of complete and utter devotion?

The question of god’s existence is futile, but the grace and fortitude of the human spirit, the joy and misery that many equate with a higher power is unquestionably affiliated with the compelling, inexplicable paradox of love. Love comes in every form of delight and irritation known to all, it is hardly ever predictable, and never practical, it’s an ancient and modern miracle.

And I’m just gonna say that love kicked ass this August as a determined octogenarian, her paintbrushes and a really really old fresco that’s more meaningful now than it ever was.

See you a the Craft Table,

JP Craft Captain

Akbar’s Site

CraftNight’s Site 

 

 

 

 

 

Wednesday, August 20th, 2012 from 9pm(ish) until 12(or later) at Akbar,  it’s CRAFTNIGHT!
Project: Paper Pony Magnet Magic!
$2 Processing Fee
$4 Cosmopolitans: Reach Out and Touch Someone! 
Special Note: GOTHTOBER Applications are OPEN until August 29th, 2012 >>> This is Gothtober >>>> This is the Gothtober BLOG

If the relentless summer temperatures have you feeling like you are a human shrinky dink, you are not alone. You know it’s hot when you see two trees fighting over a dog and the pigeons are gathering sidewalk detritus with potholders. What the hell do you do when it feels like hell?!? You call Satan and tell him to take the day off, then walk into a place with cool drinks, cool air, and cool crafts.

I found some gorgeous cardboard pony shapes, and they’re ready for magic. By magic, I mean the thousand tons of golden awesome that is YOU. Yeah, you’re special, whether you believe it or not. Somewhere in the endless matter of space, there might be a pretty close copy of you, but it’s still not exactly YOU, and your “universe doppelgänger” probably isn’t doing crafts this Wednesday… if they even have Wednesdays wherever that is. Yes yes I digress. Back to the ponies.

You can imagine that your pony is the decorated carousel steed you always wanted to take home with you. Also, it will be so much more easy to deal with this paper pony than a REAL carousel pony made of 300 lbs of carved wood with a 20 foot brass pole stuck through it. Your very own paper pony will be furnished with magnets that will help you display your equine creation on your refrigerator! A pony on the fridge is a dream come true! A pony on the fridge is the future of greatness! A pony on the fridge can be a reminder of how colorful and sparkly you can be, when all you’re doing is reaching for the almond milk! A pony on the fridge! A pony on the fridge! (It’s really fun to chant that… try it!)

Won’t you come and decorate a pretty pony? It’s hot. Tell the heat to go suck an egg. PONIES.

See you at the Craft Table,

JP Craft Captain

Akbar’s Site

CraftNight’s Site 

 

Wednesday, August 15th, 2012 from 9pm(ish) until 12(or later) at Akbar,  it’s CRAFTNIGHT!
Project: Macaroni Art
$2 Processing Fee
$4 Cosmopolitans: Obey Your Thirst! 
Special Treat from Craft Lieutenant Vero: Ice Cream Sandwich CRAZY!!! (dairy and vegan versions!) 

What’s wrong with macaroni art? Absolutely nothing, that’s what’s wrong with macaroni art! The pointlessness of macaroni art is the justification for it’s total awesomeness. Various dried pastas and legumes will be ready for you to assemble into works of art. From arresting and controversial self-portraits to full-blown fashionable and exciting necklaces, once you make something from these edible bits, you’ll look at your creation and thing to yourself: It All Makes Sense. 

August has no “official” holidays, just a bunch of “civilian” obervances like National Clown Week, Celery Fennel and Cactus Month, National Scrabble Week, National Thrift Shop Day, and National Toasted Marshmallow Day.

Turns out that August 15th is National Relaxation Day, and CraftNight will indeed be observing “Intentional Relaxation.” We shall provide you with our trademark no-pressure-low-stress environment featuring Akbar’s state-of-the-art air conditioning, expertly swirled cocktails, a melodious music medley and the craft smorgasbord piled with colorful craft supplies.

If ever there was a seasonal ritual forcing L.A. tourists and locals alike to slow down, it is with the oppressive and relentless heatwave. You can’t keep running around in this weather like its normal. If anyone else is moving around like it’s twenty degrees cooler and trying to generate productivity, just remember:
1.) They are crazy, ignore them, even if they are your boss
2.) While they may appear normal at first, eventually, they will collapse. Be ready with water, a washcloth and a strawberry margarita.
3.) If the thermometer hits 94 or higher, this report is probably from the National Weather Service thermometer in downtown L.A., which means if you are in Los Feliz, Silverlake, Echo Park or east of there, it’s actually HOTTER than the downtown therm’s report. Thus, siesta is mandatory.
4.) Doing less, or what some might call “loafing” is actually a useful form of productivity, we’re just too far away from the equator to fully understand this phenomenon.
5.) Hot weather forces idle behavior, yet being idle isn’t as idle as you think.

The truth of the situation, however, is that communing with fabulous people to do fabulous crafts can only enhance your Wednesday.

See you at the craft table, JP Craft Captain

Akbar’s Site

CraftNight’s Site 

This Wednesday, August 8th, 2012 from 9pm (ish) until 12am (or later!) at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!
Project: TBA but it will be interesting, as always so come and see us!
$2 Processing fee, please
$4 Cosmopolitans • Sharing the Passion
Olympics on the Akbar-Tron • Crazy Lasagna Cupcakes by Craft Lieutenant Vero

Also: Did you know about The Gothtober Countdown Calendar?

Applications are open…