Preemptive Horn Toot: Go see my work, it’s up until Sept. 20th! TIME STAMP
This Wednesday, August 13th, 2008 from 9pm to midnight at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!
As you may know, CraftNight completely eschews aggressive ambience featuring the display of incredible skills, feats of strength, balance, coordination, grace, or near perfect performances. As a matter of fact, things like perfection and competing under intense pressure are the reason CraftNight was invented.
We’re just going to ask you to paint a little wooden trinket on Wednesday. Most of the trinkets reflect the diversification of popular modes of transportation, but there are a few boxes and other intriguing items to paint as well. Curious? Thought so.
There will be no qualifying for team finals or individual event finals in Wooden Trinket Painting this year, as it is a winter sport, so no worries, you can just relax.
In rhythmic cocktail drinking however, here are the rules:
Control of the Apparatus: The bar patron should keep the cocktail stable, and should look as if she/he has complete control of it. Dropping the apparatus is a deduction. If the cocktail falls off the table or douses another crafter’s project, more penalties are incurred.
In addition to responsible drinking habits, we also encourage, in the Akbar Dance Rectangle Arena, choreographed routines with leaps, jumps and turns, and pirouettes. If you have your own hoop, ball, club or ribbon, feel free to use it, and if you wish to perform in true historic Athens-style (nude), no one will complain. Please be advised that there will be no judging sequence on good form and execution, we’ll just assume you do this sort of thing for fun.
Please no vaults: Not even the strongest pour in any Akbar cocktail has been able to unleash the gravity-defying fervor and kinesthetic awareness needed to propel one’s person off the counter into a handspring double front half-out.
And this just in, Mary Lou Retton, the most popular athlete in America and head of USA Gymnastics, will be unable to attend CraftNight after all. She was going to give us a “CraftNight workout” and promote the benefits of proper nutrition and regular exercise, but had a prior commitment in China that couldn’t be cancelled.
She says hello and don’t forget to practice your cocktail warm-ups, she’ll be back next year!
See you at the Craft Table!
JP Craft Captain
