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LadyBug Bead Craft Majorly Solves All Your Problems • May 28th, 2014


This Wednesday, May 28th, 2014 from 9pm until midnight (or later) at Akbar, it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!
Project: Ladybug Bead Project
$2 Processing fee, please
$4 Drink Special: “The Lyla” • Don’t drink a cup of hot fat! Drink a Lyla! 

This ladybug craft will make it so that you won’t be able to concentrate on anything else while you make it. The little craft kit consists of bright pony beads, lanyard material and a handy clasp and clip so that when you’re finished making it, you can tote it around anywhere.
Why a ladybug craft?
Ladybugs signify spring the way spiders represent autumn, it’s just one of those seasonal bugs. A seasonal bug reminder is necessary.
To tell you the truth, however, ladybugs are beetles, they absolutely aren’t bugs. Europeans have been calling them ladybirds for over 500 years, and scientists, being ever proper, call them lady beetles. Lady beetles belong to the Coleoptera class of insects. Contrary to popular belief, you can’t tell the age of a ladybug by counting its spots, you can denote species by color and spot placement, but not the former.
Boy ladybugs are also just called ladybugs. They don’t let being called “ladybugs” keep them from being really great male bugs.
Ladybugs also don’t really seem to care if they’re beetles or birds, they just eat aphids in really large quantities and never look back.
Don’t give a CRAP what anyone says, just do your thing no matter what the hell anyone calls you or whatever, just DO YOUR LIFE and eat stuff that you like and don’t worry about your house being on fire, that’s just ladybug propaganda from back when farmer’s burnt the fields to get rid of other insects.
We’re making ladybug crafts because the ladybug is a symbol reminding you that old stories no longer own you, you’re free!

A woman walked up to the bar, this Memorial Day Weekend.
The music had changed, she said to me “Is Dyke Hour over?”
I looked at her, squinted my eyes and said “Dyke hour is NEVER over.”
She shook my hand.
Because it’s true, if only 10% of the population is Dykes, you can’t afford to be thinking they’ll all disappear when the music changes.
Don’t be letting the music, or the surroundings, or the school, or the work, or the place, or your car, or procrastination keep you from what you want to find, be, do or have. BE A LADYBUG AND GO AFTER WHAT YOU WANT!
See? All your problems solved.

See you at the Craft Table,

JP Craft Captain


Posted by on May 27, 2014 in Uncategorized

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TONIGHT! • September 5th, 2012 • Scrappin’ with the Scrapbooks!

TONIGHT! Wednesday, September 5th, 2012 from 9pm(ish) until 12(or later) at Akbar,  it’s CRAFTNIGHT!
Project: Craft a Scrap Book!
$2 Processing Fee
$4 Cosmopolitans: How Many Sips Does it Take to Get to the Center of an Akbar Cosmo? I…2…
Featuring: Masseuse Therapist SKY! • Current deal is 15 minutes for 14 bucks! Get the stress out!
Also Featuring: Craft Lieutenant Veronica LeBron’s Flat-n-Crispy Bacon Laceys which need to be tasted to be believed, a classic recipe with a bacon twist, come get yours!

It’s your moment, the end of the day, to relax, unwind and have something special for yourself and your friends and your life and your cocktail. The scrap potential is very high tonight, plenty of pieces to play with to make your scrapbook fantasy come true. I actually have a really fantastic scrapbook, the latest entries in it being from 1953. I’ll bring it and share, so that you may gain inspiration from this wonderful relic.
The “scrapper” who remains unknown (I purchased this item at a swap meet in Simi Valley) has decorated the pages with countless newspaper clippings, decorative bits of paper, local ephemera, poems, pictures of exotic animals and far away destinations… it’s a quiet treasure of its era, and every time I peruse its pages I find something new.

The scrapper was prone to cutting out one sentence facts from publications, tidbits like “There are 209 rooms in Buckingham Palace” or “Painted fingernails were fashionable in Egypt, 1000 B.C.” The book is peppered with trivia, and I like the idea that no matter how old this tattered scrapbook gets, it still contains truths that will endure.

The digital age makes stuff like this exceedingly rare, and there’s actually a “scrapbook industry” that sells pre-printed pages, punch shapes, stickers, etc. that caters to “making memories.” And that’s cool… but when you look at this home made scrap book from 1953, you’re going to observe ingenuity and artistry that blows today’s manufactured scrap supplies right out the window. Cellophane scotch tape wasn’t on the market until 1930, yet miraculously enough, there isn’t a SINGLE piece of tape in this scrapbook, it’s all been put together with glue or paste.
Come in and make a little scrapbook, I’ve punched paper ahead of time for the event, I’ve got lots of paper and collage scraps, glue and glue sticks, this craft is gonna knock your socks off!

See you at the Craft Table!

JP Craft Captain

Akbar’s Site

CraftNight’s Site 


Posted by on September 5, 2012 in Uncategorized

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