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Category Archives: EZ Craft

Science Sticker Symposium! • April 19th, 2017

TONIGHT! Wednesday, April 19th, 2017 from 9pm until midnight (or later) it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!
Project: Science Sticker Symposium!  
$3 Donation Please 
$4 Drink specials! Akbar: The Only Way to Fly!    

Science is real so I illustrated SIX different stickers to help you spread the word! They involve terrible science puns, and they are fun to color in and then stick wherever you like. They are kind of DIY and kind of not, all at once. Why did I do this? The March for Science is coming up this weekend!

Here, read more about it, and register to march if you wanna:  (SCIENCE MARCH). 

What would cause brilliant, focused, quiet, researching nerds to lift their heads out of their findings and yell “WTF?!?” at the president?

For the last 20-30 years, it’s been increasingly routine for the government to slowly but surely starve scientific budgets, compromise scientific research, and restrict what scientists do. Our new administration not only supports this trend, but is accelerating the process by brazenly and proudly sending the message that climate control doesn’t matter, and science is dumb.

Here are just five key actions taken by the head honcho of 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue (oops, I mean Mar A Lago, Florida) in his first 100 days:

1.) Scott Pruitt picked for the head of the Environmental Protection Agency – This guy is a climate change denier, has long opposed environmental regulations, and is in the act of suing the EPA for the thirteenth time, this time over Obama’s Clean Power Plan which aims to reduce greenhouse gas emissions from electricity production.

2.) Rick “Bonehead” Perry chosen as Energy Secretary – Another dude who questions weather climate change is real, and he’s in charge of the nukes. Also, this is an extremely science-heavy department, usually run by physicists or engineers that Perry (not a scientist) advocated to eradicate back in 2012.

3.) Rex Tillerson is now Secretary of State – Hey, he’s the former chief of ExxonMobile, a company that has been accused of hiding climate change from its shareholders for years. He’s dismissive on clean energy solutions, and has consistently made big business choices that have stamped Exxon with prize title of “Company with the Second Largest Historical Carbon Footprint of All Time.”

4.) The Trump White House has proposed slashing $1.2 billion from research grants at the National Institutes of Health and other health and education programs this year. This is a cut separate from the $5.8 billion NIH cut Trump is calling for in 2018.

People in power who want to to live fancy should really invest in science because science is the engine of prosperity! SmartPhones, yachts, flying cars and sculptural sound panels don’t happen without LOTS of exploration and innovation.

But more importantly, science does stuff like curing illnesses, it combats climate change, it’s trying to solve global hunger, it’s working on creating alternative fuel sources. To cut funding for science is to cut funding for humanity.

You would think that no matter how money-grubbing and narcissistic some people are, they’d at least pretend to care about things like disease control, extreme weather preparedness and preserving the planet’s finite resources. You know, because then they’d seem cool, but they can’t even do that. They can only see through and act via a transactional lens, where profit is first prize, and people are fodder.

This is why it’s time to speak up for science.

See you at the Craft Table,

JP Craft Captain


UPCOMING CRAFTS, ETC.

April 24th – Bet Yer Bottom Bingo! Spring Fling Edition! • Akbar • 8pm – 10pm • Numbers, balls, boys, girls, prizes galore!

April 26th – Luv Snail Photo Kit

May 3rd – Bus Craft! I know you want a 3-D paper bus, because public transportation ROCKS!

May 10th – Ship Craft! Saiiiiiiilin’ takes me awayyyyy to where I’m goin….

May 17th – Paint-Yer-Own Flower Pot!

 

Posted by on April 19, 2017 in Coloring Craft, EZ Craft

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Yellow Submarines! • March 22nd, 2017

TONIGHT! March 22nd, 2017 from 9pm until midnight (or later) it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!
Project: Yellow Submarines! 
$3 Donation Please 
$4 Drink specials! Akbar: The Taste of Cocktail Goodness 

I didn’t want anyone falling behind in their ocean studies, so we’re making submarines this week, yellow submarines, to be exact! They’re sturdy, they are very easy to put together, and what’s more: THEY FLOAT! This is the perfect accessory for replaying scenes from The Hunt for Red October or Das Boot in the bathtub! Be glad that you aren’t actually in charge of a nuclear-powered warship, and enjoy your bath!

Or, you know, get cerebral, set your sub on a shelf and let it be a reminder of the hidden parts of yourself that make you special, parts that are amazing and unknown that even you haven’t discovered yet!

How often are you invited to assemble your own watercraft? I’m thinking it’s not often, so treat yourself, get a delicious beverage from our fearless crew, visit the CraftNight rumpus room, and enjoy assembling your foam submersible!

See you at the Craft Table,

JP Craft Captain


UPCOMING CRAFTS, ETC.

March 27th – Bet Yer Bottom BINGO!!!! 8pm to 10-ish (However long it takes to play 6 games!) Akbar!

March 29th – Optical Illusion Sand Art!

April 5th – Easter Baskets!

 

Posted by on March 22, 2017 in Assembly Craft, EZ Craft

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Conversation Heart Caterpillars • February 1st, 2017

This Wednesday, February 1st, 2017 from 9pm until midnight (or later) it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!
Project: Sno S’more Character! 
$3 Donation Please 
$4 Drink specials! Akbar: Living Unboring! 

Today I’m just gonna write something that CNN, The NY Times, The Washington Post, Reuters, NPR, or the Wall Street Journal didn’t. You can read this, and know that it’s got nothing to do with all those other things you might’ve been scrolling with red worried eyeballs for the last week and a half. Far from sticking my head in the sand about current events, there is such a thing as burnout, so last week and this week, we’re having mellow self care craft projects for our CraftNights.

It’s going to be Valentines Day soon, and on the 8th (see below) we’re going to do some political Craftivism, so I thought you might want this week for some mellow “Conversation Caterpillar” time. It comes with conversation hearts, hence it’s provocative name. Whether it’s fake or real or invented by Hallmark or wolves or corporations or nuns, Valentine’s Day is a holiday about LOVE so who cares where it came from! Get out of your own way and make a keepsake for someone cool, like the hat-wearing burrito lady, or the polite mumbly dude who always sells you your daily coffee beverage.

I don’t care if they think you’re in love with them when you’re not, just skip away emphatically if they try to smooch you. There are people suffering from far more things than drudgery in this world, if you can make just one person feel special, treated with respect, and like they matter… that’s just the thing that can fuel the momentum to help a person gain the vim and vigor to go do the things they’ve got to do.

A Conversation Caterpillar, (though it may fill you with anxiety for fear of causing inundation with a human being that might try to become your life partner after receiving one from you) is an opportunity to let other people sharing the earth with you know that they are valued and appreciated. We need more of that, and less selfish churlish bloviating.

This craft may have parts that are a genuine pain-in-the-ass to glue together, it might take awhile for parts to dry. This is good, because your irritation will be about that and not about other external factors swirling around in your periphery. Working out frustrations on a craft will enable you to focus on getting a good night’s sleep, and then you’ll wake up, and go kick some ass the next day.

See you at the Craft Table,

JP Craft Captain


Upcoming Craftivism:

February 8th: The Annual CraftNIght Love-In!!! Help send valentines to Jerry Brown and other politicians fighting for the issues we care about, and also help us send Mike Pence some really kinky sexy valentines that are really glittery and queer!

April: Protest Poster Painting Party #2 where we prepare for the TAX DAY MARCH.


MORE Things: 

FEBRUARY 8th: CRUISE at The Eagle – Just down the street from Akbar and CraftNight is another watering hole you’ll want to visit! There’ll be lip-syncing contest hosted by Tony Soto • Spankings and play from Backroom Mistresses, Bootblackers, DJ tunes, maybe take your bartender a Conversation Caterpillar made at CraftNight!  >>>Facebook Link

FEBRUARY 10th: QUEER PROM at the Sweat Spot! – We could all use a little more LOVE right about now given the current political climate and walking into an unknown future. Join us at Queer Prom to raise spirits, glasses & money for a local charity we will choose as a community. $15 Tickets
Tickets available at: http://queerpromla.brownpapertickets.com/

FEBRUARY 23rd: sSISTERSs: An Experimental Musical – A new punk musical about three sisters who may or may not be witches. Trapped in the drawing room of an old Victorian house, they take on famous triads in a psychedelic, stream-of-consciousness trip through time that explores shifting ideas of sisterhood. Who gets to be seen as a sister, and why? With a live band, haunting three-part harmonies, and throwbacks to the secret rituals of girlhood, sSISTERSs explores memory, family, mortality, queer feminist identity, and the struggles of being a woman artist.
Written and Directed by Gina YoungFacebook Link! 

 

Posted by on February 1, 2017 in Assembly Craft, EZ Craft

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Winter Birdhouse Thermometer Kit • January 25th, 2017

This Wednesday, January 25th, 2017 from 9pm until midnight (or later) it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!
Project: Winter Birdhouse Thermometer Kit
$3 Donation Please 
$4 Drink specials! Akbar: The Antidote for Civilization  

In other news, it’s been cold outside. How cold is it?

Maybe right now you don’t know, but if you put together this craft at CraftNight, you’ll definitely know! This kit’s got it all: a house, a thermometer, a googly-eyed bird, shiny glittery pieces, everything you need to make a small vignette depicting wildlife, abodes, and temperature. There will be other little showy bits for you to embellish your craft at will, so come in from the cold, warm up, and enjoy a craft and a cocktail!

Every month CraftNIght will do at least one “Craftivist” night to bring awareness and momentum toward civic engagement and change for the good of our planet and its inhabitants. These are liberal-minded, leftwing progressive evenings held at Akbar Mission Control: Special Forces Homosexual Unit with Queers and Queer allies. Don’t say we didn’t warn you. Here’s what you can expect in the months to come:

On February 8th, we’re having the Annual CraftNIght Love-In. This year we’re sending valentines to Jerry Brown and other politicians fighting for the issues we care about, and also sending Mike Pence valentines of private parts hugging each other, with LOTS of glitter.

March’s Craftivism is TBD, but in April, we’ll be having Protest Poster Painting Party #2 where we prepare for the TAX DAY MARCH.

See you at the Craft Table,

JP Craft Captain


Upcoming:

NEXT WEEK! Wednesday January 30th • 8pm • Bet Yer Bottom Bingo! ~~~~ The Winter Hearth Edition. We kickoff the year with numbers on balls, cozy and toasty,  just the way you like it! Win big bottles o’ booze and other goodies! Bottles Prizes: 3 Olives Blueberry Vodka, Crown Royal Vanilla, Jack Daniels Tennessee Fire Whisky, Ketel One Lorange! 


FEBRUARY 23rd: sSISTERSs: An Experimental Musical – Anew punk musical about three sisters who may or may not be witches. Trapped in the drawing room of an old Victorian house, they take on famous triads in a psychedelic, stream-of-consciousness trip through time that explores shifting ideas of sisterhood. Who gets to be seen as a sister, and why? With a live band, haunting three-part harmonies, and throwbacks to the secret rituals of girlhood, sSISTERSs explores memory, family, mortality, queer feminist identity, and the struggles of being a woman artist.
Written and Directed by Gina YoungFacebook Link! 

 

Posted by on January 24, 2017 in Coloring Craft, EZ Craft

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Mugs-n-Stuff • January 11th, 2017

TONIGHT! Wednesday, January 11th, 2017 from 9pm until midnight (or later) it’s CRAFTNIGHT!!!
Project: Mugs-n-Stuff 
$3 Donation Please 
$4 Drink specials! Akbar: Confidence in a glass! 

There’s nothing like sipping hot cocoa from your very own self-decorated fancy cocoa mug, is there? I’ve got limited supply of these lovely plastic receptacles, they are scientifically proven to hold hot cocoa, or even cold milk, or water, or whatever liquid you fancy!

When the mugs run out, and you don’t get one in time, there will be no wailing or gnashing of teeth, because I’ll have a “winter assortment” of other projects that are oh-so-seasonally-appropriate collection for this deliciously rainy season. Come on in and take a break, yeah you, a real bona fide break!

Because: Is life just a series of errands and New Year’s Resolutions that you complete and BOOM, you accomplished a lot of stuff and everything’s perfect? How about those less glamorous but just-as-important imperfect micro moments (ie: standing in line at the bank without looking at your phone, putting together a jigsaw puzzle of beach balls and cats, having meaningful and slow conversations, sipping cocoa)?

There is no doubt that there’s work to do, things to finish, goals to reach, no one disputes such a thing. But if you don’t relax and take time for yourself, nothing’s to get done, because you’ll be all crunch and yelly and not hearing the pulse of your own life force.

Recreation isn’t a luxury, darling, it’s a necessity. Come on over and treat yourself!

See you at the Craft Table,

JP Craft Captain


Upcoming:

Wednesday January 18th – SIGN MAKING SALON! Help Make Protest Signs for the upcoming rallies for yourself and others! Exercise your first amendment rights to be seen and heard:

**** Rally to Save Roe – Thursday, January 19 at 5:30 PM NCJW | LA Council House 543 N Fairfax. Los Angeles, 90036 >>> More Info Here
**** United Against Hate Inauguration March Los Angeles – Friday Jan 20 at 11 AM – 6 PM >>> Here’s the FB Event 
**** Womens March Los Angeles – Saturday, January 21 at 9 AM Pershing Square >>> More Info on FB


Wednesday January 30th • 8pm • Bet Yer Bottom Bingo! ~~~~ The Winter Hearth Edition. We kickoff the year with numbers on balls, cozy and toasty,  just the way you like it! Win big bottles o’ booze and other goodies!

 

Posted by on January 11, 2017 in Coloring Craft, EZ Craft

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